Love Equals Happy: Lessons from Society.

So I’ve talked on here before about a friend who tried to shove her happy relationship down my throat by offering to set me up with a friend of hers (Read here). While I always greatly appreciate my friends offering to set me up with randos, it annoys the heck out of me. Another friend of mine does this because she “wants me to be happy.”

…Oh, I didn’t realize I wasn’t happy.

Since when did a girl have to have a boyfriend to be happy? Somewhere on the road of life, a girl learns that in society, you have to be in a relationship to find happiness. Based off my limited experience in relationships, I would have to disagree. In the few relationships I’ve been in, I wanted to pull my hair out. Each guy had different characteristics that I tried to look past; the longer I tried, the more annoyed I got. So, I got out of the relationship each time. And each time I felt a new sense of unbelievable happiness, I was free!

(No joke, after my first boyfriend and I broke up, I skipped around the house with a big smile on my face, dancing to happy music. I suspect most hard time prisoners do this upon their release…).

I have a feeling this is an unusual response to a breakup; most girls I know cry for days and eat pints of ice cream to soothe their broken hearts. Is it weird that I celebrate? Granted, my relationships haven’t lasted longer than mere weeks due to my inability to tolerate another person for longer than 8 days, but shouldn’t I be somewhat sorrowful? Usually a few weeks back into single world, I do get rather sad about being alone again. But I’d rather be alone than trapped in a relationship where I’m unhappy. So forgive me for refusing to date, but I’m happier this way.

Will I be single forever? Chances are yes, but you never know, maybe I’ll find someone out there that I can tolerate for more than 3 seconds. I can sort of already see myself becoming that work driven corporate bitch who runs the world with her smartphone and a cup of coffee, having no time for a serious relationship. Part of me is sort of okay with that. (Even though that totally means that I’m a Miranda, sigh I JUST WANT TO BE A CARRIE. Or more importantly, a Charlotte).  I would rather be single for the rest of my life than settle for something just because society tells me that’s how I’ll be happy. I feel that I’m doing pretty well as a cynical, sarcastic twenty something about to break out into the world of life.  There are most definitely worse things in life than being single, just saying. I mean, I could be doing worse. I could be on like drugs, for instance. So overall, I think I’m doing just fine in life as a single & fabulous lady.

Love, B.

I ain’t no stick figure silicone Barbie doll

First, let me say that ‘All About that Bass’ has me dancing all over the place. Next, let me say why I love it even more than the catchy beat and fun lyrics.

It outwardly stands against society’s ‘Barbie Doll’ image that little girls are learning to conform to. Meghan Trainor stands up against those ‘skinny bitches’ and tells us it’s okay to have a little bit of booty. She even calls out the use of Photoshop, stating how it isn’t real. This weekend I was at a community event and little girls were dancing and singing every lyric to this song. Granted, there’s a bit of swearing that I would rather a child not hear, but overall, I agree with her lyrics and her stance against society.  I think it’s great that younger girls are hearing this message.

However, a good friend of mine was mildly offended at the song’s lyrics, saying that she, as a skinny girl with no curves, felt that the song was saying she wasn’t good for boys who wanted to hold some booty at night. I do see how these lyrics could come off as skinny shaming. I reminded my friend of this section of the lyrics…

Go ahead and tell them skinny bitches that
No I’m just playing. I know you think you’re fat
But I’m here to tell ya
Every inch of you is perfect from the bottom to the top

She makes a reference to skinny bitches, but states ‘I’m just playing’ and precedes to assure even the skinny girls (who ultimately think they are fat) that they are perfect. As a size 2, I was not at all offended and I 100% think there should be more songs/ads/movies/shows/etc. supporting the idea that women’s bodies are ‘perfect from the bottom to the top.’ So I applaud you, Meghan Trainor, keep doing your thang, pretty lady!Reader, what do you think? Does this song send a positive message?

Love, B.