Here’s What I’ve Read So Far…

Hello Reader! I don’t know where you are, but I hope you are warm! I’ve been stuck inside due to inclement weather so I’ve been working hard on my book list. These are the ones I’ve already read and crossed off. Here’s what I thought of them…

/home/wpcom/public_html/wp-content/blogs.dir/6ce/66502323/files/2015/01/img_0124.jpgtiny beautiful things.

I said this in a previous post, but run out to your nearest library, book sale, Amazon.com and get your paws on this book. I want to buy it for everyone I know, especially all my twentysomething friends. It’s chalk full of amazing words and advice that anyone could relate to their own life. Strayed will leave you wanting to find love, chase life and forgive not only others but also yourself. Trust me when I say you will want to keep this one on your shelf to reread for many years to come.

This is Where I Leave You.

Another blogger commented that I would L-O-V-E this and, of course, I did. I think I read it in a day. The story is beautifully written and it made me laugh out loud on page and want to cry the next. Tropper did an excellent job of portraying typical family that is full of issues. In a way, it makes you feel thankful for your not so messed up family. I sort of didn’t like the ending because I need a firm resolution, followed by ‘and they lived happily ever after. The End.’ But the end was sort of like, open to endless possibilities, which was the point for the main character‘s storyline. In all, the story, characters and writing were all excellent and I think you should also add this one to your Kindle library, or your Amazon cart or whatever means you fancy for reading, add this now.

The Pact

BONUS! I snuck this book into my reading mix, mainly because the other book from my list wasn’t available and I needed a filler. I’ve been meaning to read this for years and I’m so glad I did. In short, two star crossed lover teens make a pact to commit suicide together. That’s what the back tells you, but this. story. is. SO. much. more. than. that.

If you like Law & Order SVU. Read this.

If you like Romeo & Juliet. Pick up this book.

If you like complicated storylines that you think one thing and then something else happens and you just tear through the book to get to the end. Here’s your story.

Picoult does a flawless job of making this story intricate and complicated and beautiful. I could feel how tormented and alone Emily felt. Not justifying suicide, but I could see how Emily felt no other way out. In short, only one of the teens dies when they commit suicide together and the other is charged with her murder. And the truth isn’t revealed until the end (of course), but you’re lead to believe several different things throughout the book. I felt like I was part of the jury, and at one point, I was convinced Chris killed Emily. Did he?! Read it and see!

I’m currently reading, Yes Please, so you’ll have to check back to see how much I loved that. I can tell you, I’ve already been laughing out loud and I’m on page 107. Side note: This book weighs like 85 pounds, not even close to kidding…

What books have you been reading, Reader? Anything I should peruse?

Let me know in the comments!

Love, B.

2015 Goals.

1. Kindness
I know I’m somewhat kind, but I want to be a better person. That green monster, Envy, and his not so nice friends, Grumpy and Selfish always get on my back. My friends sometimes have to dance around my temperamental moods and I do feel bad about that. Here’s to a better attitude and a kind heart!

2. Moisturize moisturize, MOISTURIZE.

Miracle Worker, Philosophy

I’m basically 22, so I’m pretty much 30, and I need to start adding more moisture to my skin. I want to take care of my skin so in fifteen years I won’t be running to get Botox, or wishing I could go back in time and kick my twentysomething self in the butt for not caring about my skin.

3. Build a wardrobe.
Graduating college and heading into the professional world means I can’t necessarily wear leggings as pants everyday (Boo!!). I need to build a wardrobe with some more expensive staples that will last awhile. I also want versatile pieces that can be paired with a few different things. Oh, darn, I’ll have to go shopping, won’t I?

4. Put down the electronics!!
Reader, I got an iPad mini for Christmas and it’s been attached to my right hand ever since. I mean I’m reading and blogging and pinning on Pinterest! I’m totally addicted to my little beauty. But I do want to set down my electronics and spend more time in the present with those around me. It’s my one thing from this past year that I didn’t quite get to work on that much…

Reader, I hope you’ve had a beautiful year and I can’t wait to see you in 2015!

Best wishes for the new year, B.

Bring It, 2015

Dear Reader,

I’ve been doing some self reflecting about the past year, and I have to say it was a year I didn’t see coming. But in the same breath, the writing was on the wall and perhaps I had ignored it. Inevitable things happened as I figured they would. There were ups and downs, days I cried and days I couldn’t stop laughing. The sad thing of this year was that it was my last safe year. A year that I knew where I was going to be, I knew what I was doing, and that I’d be okay. As for 2015? Well, I’m graduating college, so there’s that big question mark. Will I get a job? Will I move out of my parent’s house officially? Will I ever be able to afford the ‘everything is cute & mismatched but it incidentally all looks great together‘ apartment that I see in my head upon entering any TJ Maxx (that’s my biggest dream of the moment… like, next to landing a cool job)?

I try not to stress and plan for the future. In the past, I have and things have always seemed to work out. Call it karma, God’s plan or what you will but I firmly believe that everything will be alright. Sure, there will sucky days that I’ll want to throw in the towel but there will also be days that I’ll want to last forever. Every year, there’s good and bad mixed with lessons and memories. I only hope to keep learning and living, and especially to keep laughing.

At the beginning of 2014, I decided to make a list of goals, not resolutions. I don’t necessary believe in resolutions because people always say them and never follow through. Instead, I thought of 5 goals that I had hoped for myself. Here they are in all their glory….

20141. For one thing, I think I did smile more. Or I found more moments to be happy. Or I just watched more comedy sitcoms on Netflix (Mindy Project FTW).

2. I definitely read more. Reader, can you believe I didn’t read a single Nicholas Spark’s novel this year?! I found myself reading a lot more inspirational reading this year, books that encourage me to take hold of life. Remember my post on books I’d like to read over break? I’ve just finished tiny beautiful things by Cheryl Strayed, and I need you to go out and find it right now, Reader. Please, do it for me, for you and for your life. It’s beyond perfect.

3. I DID IT, READER. I stopped looking for love around every corner I turned. I’m learning to fall in love with myself and to not sit around waiting for Prince Charming; however, I could look to God more…

4 & 5. I improved on these ends but not as much as I’d like to.

So, I’d have to say, it’s been a pretty great year. As it becomes 2015 and I turn 22, I only hope I can fall in love with life more. Hopefully, I’ll be back in a year to tell you the answer to all my unanswered questions concerning the future. Reader, I hope your year was just as amazing; if not, I pray this year is better for you. Check back soon for my 2015 goals!

Love, B.

Love Equals Happy: Lessons from Society.

So I’ve talked on here before about a friend who tried to shove her happy relationship down my throat by offering to set me up with a friend of hers (Read here). While I always greatly appreciate my friends offering to set me up with randos, it annoys the heck out of me. Another friend of mine does this because she “wants me to be happy.”

…Oh, I didn’t realize I wasn’t happy.

Since when did a girl have to have a boyfriend to be happy? Somewhere on the road of life, a girl learns that in society, you have to be in a relationship to find happiness. Based off my limited experience in relationships, I would have to disagree. In the few relationships I’ve been in, I wanted to pull my hair out. Each guy had different characteristics that I tried to look past; the longer I tried, the more annoyed I got. So, I got out of the relationship each time. And each time I felt a new sense of unbelievable happiness, I was free!

(No joke, after my first boyfriend and I broke up, I skipped around the house with a big smile on my face, dancing to happy music. I suspect most hard time prisoners do this upon their release…).

I have a feeling this is an unusual response to a breakup; most girls I know cry for days and eat pints of ice cream to soothe their broken hearts. Is it weird that I celebrate? Granted, my relationships haven’t lasted longer than mere weeks due to my inability to tolerate another person for longer than 8 days, but shouldn’t I be somewhat sorrowful? Usually a few weeks back into single world, I do get rather sad about being alone again. But I’d rather be alone than trapped in a relationship where I’m unhappy. So forgive me for refusing to date, but I’m happier this way.

Will I be single forever? Chances are yes, but you never know, maybe I’ll find someone out there that I can tolerate for more than 3 seconds. I can sort of already see myself becoming that work driven corporate bitch who runs the world with her smartphone and a cup of coffee, having no time for a serious relationship. Part of me is sort of okay with that. (Even though that totally means that I’m a Miranda, sigh I JUST WANT TO BE A CARRIE. Or more importantly, a Charlotte).  I would rather be single for the rest of my life than settle for something just because society tells me that’s how I’ll be happy. I feel that I’m doing pretty well as a cynical, sarcastic twenty something about to break out into the world of life.  There are most definitely worse things in life than being single, just saying. I mean, I could be doing worse. I could be on like drugs, for instance. So overall, I think I’m doing just fine in life as a single & fabulous lady.

Love, B.

Desires&Wants.

Did you ever feel the need to run? Thrusting your whole body forward  into the unknown, with the wind pounding against your face and your hair in a tangled mess behind you? I want to do just that. I want to break free and run away from it all. From the responsibility and the fear, to propel myself forward into the unknown where I know my dreams are hiding. I want to race after those desires I’ve kept in my heart, for unleashing them and reaching them are the only two things I desire.

Desire is a funny thing. “A strong feeling of wanting to have something or wishing for something to happen.” It’s all about what I want, it’s what you want. Want want want want. But is it right? We don’t need these things, when did we decide these things were the things that would make us happy in life? Where did I get the notion that a boy who loved me would make me happy? When did I get the dream to have a job in the field of my choice making X amount of dollars?

I want to travel the world and see beautiful things. See things that take away my breath, the views, the landmarks, the art. I want to cry at the beauty at it all. I want to watch the sunrise from the top of a mountain and bask in the sunlight of a new day, a new beginning.

I want to do something with my life that I’m passionate about. Something that gives me a reason to get out of bed every morning, that I can’t wait to do, that gives me a purpose. I want a job that allows me to have nice things, to give nice things to others.

I want a man to fall in love with me. I want him to look at me, not seeing the beauty but seeing the imperfections and loving those more. I want to take his breath away. I want to start each day waking up to his smile and end every day gazing at his face until I can’t keep my eyes open anymore. I want to stay up and talk to him, I want him to know every part of who I am and vice versa. I want to love him. I want to love him so fiercely that my heart hurts from smiling so much. I want to scream and fight and makeup, because our love is worth it.

I want to draw. I want to be up to my knees in art, works of beauty that were made by my hands. I want to read, every book I can get my hands on. I want to fill my brain with knowledge of many things, all things.

I want to laugh, laugh until I can’t breathe. In that moment, I hope I realize that these moments are few, the ones that take your breath away, that is. Because when it comes down to it, that’s all we desire, right? Those moments that will carry us through to the end and make it all worth while. Those moment may be few, but they mean the most.

That’s what I want. That’s what I just might need.

Love, B.