While talking to my therapist* recently, I realized that I don’t exactly know what makes me happy. I am one of those, I want everyone else to be happy so I do whatever they want to ensure that they have a wonderful life type of people.
And sometimes I forget about myself in the process.
For instance, I dated someone mostly because my friend really wanted us to be together. He was sweet and I realized that I wasn’t into him as much as he deserved and then I had to end it. But looking back, I was sort of forced into it because I felt I needed to make my friend happy. I have realized most recently that sometimes I need to make me happy.
So how do I make myself happy?
I don’t want to necessarily do this because I always end up forgetting due to time, but I want to try the 100 days of happy. I won’t post every day, but I’ll keep a list and post every now and again about the things that make me happy.
I know it’s old and I know it’s been done a million times before, but everyone who has done it seems to have really been able to discover what truly makes them happy. Most days I think I’m happy and other days I think it’s all a sham. But I know that I want to be happy and I want to take control of my life and do it on my terms.
So Reader, I make a promise for 100 days to try and find happiness. And no, it’s not for you or my friends or family or anyone else.
It’s for me.
*My friend who’s a psych major and oddly excels at constantly giving me advice about how to get my crap together. I’m pretty sure when she goes to grad school, she’ll use me as her case studies because of my inability to function as an actual adult.